Hello!

It’s been a while since I’ve gotten around to blogging about what I’ve been painting - I fear I’m quite behind!

I’ve mentioned this before, but the strangest shift has occurred in my studio over the past couple months. When I packed away my oil paints to move to Texas 2.5 years ago, I thought for sure I’d never open that box again. Oils were so frustrating to me - I could never make them do what I wanted, and the smell always gave me a headache in the little basement room where I painted at the time.

But in September of this year, I got them out again. I had been feeling for months like the paintings I REALLY wanted to make, required the velvety smoothness of oils. And I was COMPLETELY RIGHT.

I put my watercolors away (which is what I used to exclusively use) and have been oil painting ever since. I’ve only picked up watercolor once since then, and it was by request (for a commission). Crazy!

In the past couple of months, I’ve taken huge strides. My paintings are finally starting to feel like ME.

Part of my “renaissance" is due to a medium that can properly execute my vision. The buttery blendability of oils is so pleasing - I love the wet texture; the subtlety of the in-between shades that can be achieved and controlled.

The other part is so dumb. Like, I should have made this change years ago - why was I doing this for so long?? I used to consume so much art from other artists. I would never outright copy or be derivative - I knew that was tacky and wrong. But I was allowing myself to be inspired by other work. HEAVILY. I was under the impression that it would make my own work better, to surround myself with other art I loved.

As a result, for years, my art has felt like it tumbled all over the place. Colors, subject matter, composition, technique - it felt like as soon as I made a painting I somewhat liked, I’d want the next one to be totally different! I could never settle down in something that I loved, not because I was all over the place, but because my mind was being bogged down with outside ideas.

I had a moment of clarity in October. I was praying to know what my “next step” should be as an artist. I knew Heavenly Father was aware of my frustration with this aspect of my journey, and I was prompted to turn off all outside sources of inspiration. Mainly Instagram and Pinterest. I was assured that all needed inspiration came from inside my soul.

I can remember a time before smartphones were a part of my life. When there was no social media for me. Just a teeming, churning universe of inspiration inside my mind.

Social media came along and did something amazing for me: it showed me that there were other people doing what I might have never thought was possible. There were artists who were making their careers work for them - whether they were mothers, worked other full-time jobs, or otherwise followed a different sort of path as an artist. They were doing it, and doing it successfully! So I don’t regret letting social media into my life.

But getting rid of excess noise has really allowed me to tap into what was already there inside me.

It’s been a process. It’s still emerging. And it needs work. A LOT of work.

But I’m so happy about what’s happening to me.

These two paintings are quite saturated with green. Part of my transition into a new medium has been translating what I’ve learned about painting with watercolor (where the values can only travel from one direction; light to dark) into oil, where the rules are different, the medium handles differently, and different things are possible.

I LOVE the color green. So I decided to take a tube of my favorite Sap Green and just make a couple of paintings using primarily that color. I woke up with visions in my head of figures interacting and embracing; souls communing on the other side.

I wanted to create a painting with blurred figures, multiple souls, and the longer you looked at it, the more you could see. It didn’t turn out exactly the way I had envisioned, but I did discover my love for a real good SLIPPERY painting. Wet with turpenoid. Colors sliding around on top of one another. It’s a technique I’ve carried into subsequent paintings.

I whipped out one more painting in the same session in my usual style: monochromatic, chiaroscuro (defined light & shadow) and, of course, friggin bright green.

I adore these little paintings. Green is so soothing and yet so stimulating and creative. I’m so happy Heavenly Father decided to make green the color of growing things. I feel like that’s what’s happening to me.

Thanks for reading!

Amber